home
***
CD-ROM
|
disk
|
FTP
|
other
***
search
/
Monster Media 1996 #14
/
Monster Media No. 14 (April 1996) (Monster Media, Inc.).ISO
/
bbs_door
/
letman04.zip
/
LETDAT.ZIP
/
TT10.26
< prev
next >
Wrap
Text File
|
1994-11-14
|
844b
|
31 lines
TOP TEN SIGNS YOUR JUDGE IS BORED
10. HALFWAY THROUGH TRIAL, HAS HIS CHAIR REPLACED WITH A
LA-Z-BOY RECLINER
9. HE ASKS NEW WITNESSES THEIR NAME, ADDRESS, AND IF
THEY'VE HEARD ANY GOOD JOKES LATELY
8. SUDDENLY STANDS UP AND SCREAMS AT DEFENDANTS "FOR
GOD'S SAKE---PLEAD GUILTY AND I'LL DO YOUR TIME!"
7. HE'S POPPING NO-DOZ LIKE CHICLETS
6. WON'T STOP POUNDING THE GAVEL
5. HE ASKS JURY MEMBERS TO DRESS AS THEIR FAVORITE COMIC
BOOK CHARACTERS
4. SHOUTS OUT "GUILTY" AND THEN SAYS "JUST PRACTICING"
3. HIS EYES JUST SEEM TO GLAZE OVER WHEN YOU TRY TO EXPLAIN
TO HIM WHY YOU WERE GOING 82 MPH ON THE MERRITT PKWY
2. AFTER EVERY BIT OF TESTIMONY, INTERJECTS "WERE YOU NAKED
AT THE TIME?"
1. HE'S EATING A LAWBOOK
Letterman, Wednesday, October 26, 1994
Copyright Worldwide Pants, Inc. 1994